


In the Cards

by GirlWhoLovesMonsters



Category: Marilyn Manson (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-23
Updated: 2018-09-30
Packaged: 2019-04-26 19:17:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 14,103
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14408793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GirlWhoLovesMonsters/pseuds/GirlWhoLovesMonsters





	1. Chapter 1

"WOW!" Brian's eyes were wide with surprise as he turned to Johnny. "Dude! What the fuck?" He spoke with uncertain excitement. 

"This is me spoiling you." Johnny replied slyly ushering Brian towards the plane. "Just let me."

"Yeah but why? I don't need this. The airport is fine, I use it all the time to travel. Where are we going anyway!? I wondered why my driver was bringing me here. Johnny, this is insane!" The wind of the terminal blew his hair around and he struggled to run his fingers threw it, clutching his hat in one hand so it didn't blow away. 

"Dude shut your face. I honestly don't know why I haven't been letting you use the plane before now. Just never occurred to me and you never ask. But what's mine is yours. Now. I knew if I told you, you'd find a way out of it. We're going on fucking vacation. We're both off tour for a while, I'm done filming, let's just go. Get the fuck out of here." 

"What does that even mean, what's mine is yours? What is that? Vacation? I don't vacation. Where? The beach? Do you know how much sunscreen I need to maintain this complexion!!?"

Johnny let out a chuckled sigh shaking his head ignoring the first question.  
"I'm not stupid enough to try to take you to the beach. You can't swim." He giggled at his joke, when Brian rolled his eyes. 

"Well then where are we going?"

"Just get on the damn plane and you'll see."

"I don't have any stuff. I didn't pack." 

"Brian for fuck sakes you're such a drama queen. You don't need anything. Just get your ass on my fucking plane." Johnny smiled up at him, with his charming grin. "Please." 

Brian groaned exaggeratedly and stalked towards the men on the tarmac. He trudged up the steps to the plane and gasped at the sight of it. He'd been on private jets before and first class all that jazz but he'd never been on Johnny's plane, or anything that seemed this fancy. A suited gentleman stood by the window next to the walkway to the cockpit, holding a tray with wine. 

"Mr. Depp, it's a pleasure to fly with you again." He created them handing the glasses to each of them, and nodding at Brian.   
"Brian. Just Brian." Brian spoke softly accepting the drink.   
"Brian." The gentleman repeated in acknowledgement. "Enjoy your flight."   
Brian thanked him and followed Johnny to a sofa style seat in the far most part of the plane. 

A stewardess came into the cabin and made the mandated announcements, requesting they buckle up for take off, and then proceeded to offer them snacks.

Brian declined the snacks and shifted in his seat he'd taken across from Johnny, trying to assess the situation. He took a deep breath and looked at Johnny, squinting his eyes at him, suppressing a smile that was fighting to be seen. "Okay I'm stuck here now, can you please tell me what this is?"

Johnny slowly shook his head no. "We're not off the ground yet. You're not trapped, you can leave if you want. Just tell me, I'll have her help you debark." Johnny answered with a sarcastic lilt to his voice. 

Brian groaned almost childishly and laid his head back against the chair letting out another sigh. He closed his eyes and braced for take off, when he felt the plane moving, he always hated take off, his stomach would flip and his ears always popped. 

"Breathe Brian. As much as you fly you'd think you'd gotten over this by now you know."

Brian scoffed. "Shut up Johnny, I can't help it." He didn't open his eyes but he did smile. Finally the plane leveled out and he got comfortable stretching his long legs out across the space between them. Johnny eyed him over and smiled, glad he was calming down. 

"You're going to have fun. We're going to have fun together. Too much shit going on, we need a break. You're my best friend and I haven't seen much of you. That's why I'm dragging you along against your will as it is." Johnny mumbled. 

Brian nodded and sipped his wine. "You got WiFi here?" 

"Put your phone down Brian. Nothing on here is that important right now. Give it." Johnny made a grabbing motion for the phone and took it, waving the stewardess over to take it. Brian huffed but allowed it to happen. 

"Give her yours." He retorted. Johnny nodded and complied, handing it over. 

They exchanged small talk and a few glasses of wine over the next few hours, Brian noticed it was dark outside the plane as he stood to go the bathroom. "Where do I pee?"

Johnny pointed to the restroom and relaxed out on the sofa. When Brian returned Johnny readjusted and gestured for him to sit with him. "Sit with me?"   
Brian crinkled his brow but shrugged and sat. "Tired?" Johnny whispered, pulling Brian back against him, draping an arm over his shoulder, and around his chest. Brian didn't resist, just nestled in, they'd cuddled before this was nothing out of the norm, if anything it was comfortable and soothing. Johnny sat his now empty glass down on the pull table and used that hand to stroke his hair. Brian made a content moan against the feeling. 

"What time is it? We've been flying a long time." 

"It's 9:30. We will have to stop soon and refuel. Won't take long at all. You should get some sleep though. I could use it too." Johnny neglected to tell him the plane had beds, all they had to do was set them up, he was comfortable the way they were, he wanted to keep Brian where he was against his body.

Brian yawned and nodded. "Okay. We don't have to get off for that?"

"No. We get to stay on the plane. Close your eyes." Johnny pressed his lips against his temple leaving a kiss there, though he actually didn't mean too. The thought was in his head, where it was meant to stay, though Brian didn't seem to mind, he just closed his eyes and steadied his breathing, falling asleep against Johnny's body.

When he opened his eyes again it was still dark out. He felt like he'd been asleep for hours, Johnny was still asleep, breathing steadily beneath his body. He slowly removed himself to go to the bathroom again trying not to wake him. Johnny slowly let his eyes flutter open at the absence and shifted up sitting on the couch stretching and rubbing his face with his palms. 

Brian sauntered back into the room sleepily, nodding at Johnny who was awake now, watching him. Johnny stood and dug around in the compartment above them pulling out two packages with toothbrushes and toothpaste, other small toiletry items and handed one to Brian.   
He noted the clock on the wall above Brian's head, they'd been flying for 14 hours, they'd had some ground time for sure they'd probably slept through, while the captains changed out at the fuel stop. They'd be landing soon. "Well land soon, go wash up. I'll go after you." Johnny spoke softly. 

Brain took the package and walked back to the bathroom, doing the things he needed to do and then plopped himself into the chair he started in. 

"Dude is that right? What time is it? It's night still? Tomorrow? How long have we been in the air? Shit man were in a different time zone aren't we? Another country. Johnny!"   
Johnny chuckled walking to the bathroom listening to Brian settle with the time warp feeling he had.   
Once Johnny had come back, the stewardess was setting out breakfast. Pancakes, sausage, scrambled eggs with ketchup just the way Brian liked. Which only further intrigued him as to what the fuck was going on. Brian thanked the steward and stewardess for the food and started to ask for water and juice, which the man was already walking back with, making Brian sit there with his mouth agape mid sentence. Johnny smiled at him as he approached.   
As he walked to the seat next to Brian he bent over to sit but planted a kiss on Brian's lips before he sat. "Morning. Sleep alright?" 

Brian blinked at him and nodded. "Morning, Yeah uh, thanks for breakfast." 

"Of course. It's what you like right?" They fell into a comfortable silence as they ate, they resembled a couple that'd been together for years, more than friends sharing breakfast. Brian didn't oppose any of Johnny's gestures, even took his hand in his own as he finished his food, he thought it was more affectionate than normal but it was nice, he was glad Johnny had laced his fingers comfortably into his own. 

They sat comfortably as the plates were cleared, Johnny holding onto Brian's hand tightly, rubbing his thumb over his skin softly. He brought his hand up to his face and kissed the back of his tattooed hand. "You're an amazing person Brian, you deserve someone to treat you that way. You know that right?"

Before Brian could answer the finely dressed steward spoke up in his soothing tone, letting them know they'd start their descent and would be landing soon. Brian laid his head back and closed his eyes, gripping Johnny's hand firmly. Johnny rubbed his head with his free hand, trying to help him relax as they made their landing.

"Ready? Let's get moving." Johnny stated letting him know it was over. Brian stood, letting go of Johnny's hand and straitening out their clothes. Johnny collected their phones and walked off the plane behind him. 

"That's the car over their. They will take us to our hotel." Johnny pointed to the car, shuffling towards it. 

"Jet lag is going to be serious huh?" Brian complained climbing into the backseat.

"Yeah, well just get up early tomorrow even if we don't want too and start our vacation then. I've already got dinner coming to the room when we check in so we won't have to leave or anything." 

"Ah okay. Sounds good to me. Now where the fuck are we?" 

"Seoul." 

Brian just blinked at him and shook his head accepting it.

"Why Seoul?"

"Last time you toured here you said you'd wished you'd gotten to see it since you were only here long enough to do the show and leave. So I thought we'd see the things there are to see. Maybe for a few days and then we can go anywhere you want to go."

Brian stared at him in disbelief. "Dude, this is not how you vacation. What the hell?"

"But it's what you wanted, it's how you vacation, or how you're going to vacation. Relax, I've literally taken care of everything that has to be handled, all we have to do is relax, hang out, pick where we want to go and what we want to do."

"Thanks, really I'm not sure what..." Brian mumbled looking down fumbling with his fingers.  
Johnny cut him off placing his hand under Brian's chin, lifting his face to meet his eyes. He pressed his lips against his gently, waiting momentarily for a reaction. When he felt Brian kiss him back he increased the pressure of the kiss, opening his mouth slightly, so his tongue could swipe softly over Brian's full lips not asking for entrance just giving hint if his interest. 

By the time they'd reached the hotel they'd both had to make adjustments from where they'd been making out like teenagers in the car. Once they deemed themselves presentable they both crawled out of the car and accepted the keys from the driver who had checked them in. 

"Hope you don't mind, I only booked one room." Johnny smiled slyly as he pocketed the keys to the room, Brian giggled covering his mouth with his fingers and followed Johnny to their room.


	2. Chapter 2

Johnny opened the door to the hotel room, letting Brian walk in first. It was a large suite, kitchen, bed room, sitting room area, giant bathroom with multi person tub, it looked fit for royalty as far as Brian was concerned. He looked around the massive room slowly approaching the bed, taking his hat back off and laying it at the foot of the bed. 

"Soooo..." he clapped his hands awkwardly in front of his body looking at everything except Johnny. 

"Sooo." Johnny replied casually, opening the closet pulling out a t-shirt from the shelf, as well as two pairs of pajama pants. He handed the shirt and a pair of pants to Brian. "Here, go get a shower. You'll find everything you need in the bathroom. Hope those pajamas are okay. I wasn't here when they were purchased. I tried to be specific, I know how you are." Johnny rambled in a low mumble. 

"Everyth... Wait, what?" Brian walked over and opened the closet doors finding multiple outfits both casual and formal, pajamas, even a few pair of shoes. "Did you buy me a wardrobe?" Brian asked full of confusion. 

"Yes. I knew if I told you or asked you even, you would have said no. So I kidnapped you. You'll develop Stockholm syndrome and fall madly in love with me and the life of plush luxury." Johnny used a voice that would imply he was acting, just being silly.

"Don't get your hopes up Mr. Depp." Brian remarked snidely walking towards the bathroom. His favorite body wash and shampoo were there, an array of make ups, hair spray, facial cleanser, tooth brush, the toothpaste and mouth wash he liked, so many other things. He came bounding out of the bathroom this time with a mission, tone fussing. "Johnny! How much attention do you pay to me? Did you inventory my house, tour bags, what? You asked my assistant? This is insane, what is this? Johnny you're fucking with my head man, what kind of trip is this? We don't do..." Johnny stepped forward grinning a little at the tangent Brian was going on, he shook his head slowly in amusement and then proceeded to kiss him again. 

He broke the kiss and looked Brian in the eyes, holding his gaze. "I told you. The kind where you fall madly in love with me. As I have you." 

Brian just blinked at him, unsure of what to say. 

"Go." Johnny spoke softly. "Get a shower, I know how you get when you travel, I'm surprised you're still dressed and not trying to peel your skin off."

Brian collected himself. "We didn't go through the public airport. I'm fine. I'll go shower though. Thanks for everything. I'm sure this vacation will do us both good." Brian nodded and turned on his heels towards the bathroom again.

Johnny lay across the bed flipping through channels waiting for Brian to come out of the bathroom. He was nervous about this trip, they'd never vacationed together, they hung out a lot and toured together, but this was different. Johnny hadn't really had any plans other than convincing him to come and taking care of him. He liked taking care of people, being single was hard for both of them, in truth he didn't know what would come of this, but he did know that the love he felt for Brian was real. Exploring that excited him, he hoped Brian would give it a go. If they crashed and burned they burn together and that is all Johnny wanted, neither of them could be alone.

Brian came out of the bathroom toweling his hair with one towel and another wrapped around his waist. "Anything good on?" He asked casually trying to start some sort of conversation. Johnny just shook his head no, and then stood, grabbing his own pajamas and walking to the bathroom. The gesture its self was innocent and typical enough but given the days events it left Brian confused. He decided to shake it off and pulled on his pajamas. They fit just right and we're the flannel material he liked, he smiled and sat on the bed. It then fully occurred to him, this room only had one bed and wasn't sure how long this trip was meant to last. They'd shared a bed before but now he was second guessing everything he would normally do. It was late here, but they'd slept on the plane so he wasn't very sleepy, tired but not sleepy. He wished he had known so he could pack, Johnny had taken his phone and still hadn't returned it, he didn't even have drugs, which really sucked because everything he had taken before they left was long gone from his system. He rested his head back against the headboard and closed his eyes waiting for Johnny, he'd ask him to hook him up so he didn't get the shakes, he was already hot.


	3. 3

By the time Johnny came out of the bathroom Brian had broken into a light sweat and was a little annoyed. He wasn't annoyed really but his lack of drugs was getting him irritated. He couldn't help it, 28 years was a long time to be on something almost daily and anytime he went without the first few days were rough. The fact that he often went weeks at a time was the only thing he held onto to say he wasn't an addict. Johnny looked over at Brian laying on the bed and smiled, removing his towel and shimmied on some sweats. "You look adorably frustrated. Still upset I kidnapped you?" Johnny asked innocently enough crawling into his place on the bed, pecking Brian on the forehead. He tasted the little beads of sweat and smiled a little. 

"No, just wish I could have packed." 

"Well what would've you brought that I haven't provided already? I'll get it for you. I want you to be happy." 

Brian rolled his eyes at the man and sighed. "Drugs" he growled flatly. 

"Why do you need drugs? You have me!" Johnny grinned. 

"Because they're fun Johnny."

"More fun than me?" Johnny made an exaggerated pout, rolling over so he was smashed awkwardly against the other man.

Brian scoffed and pushed him away playfully. "No I guess not. I'll be fine."

"Damn right you will. Everything will be fine. Now what're we gon' do 'til these folks wake up 'round 'ere." 

"Nothing is on, nothing I can understand anyway." Brian flipped the tv off and crawled out of the covers, flopping dramatically.

After about a minute of his dramatics being ignored by Johnny, Brian decided to get up again. He paced for bit and then looked at Johnny trying to make a pitiful face. 

"What?" 

Brian huffed dramatically. 

"What?" 

Brian rolled his eyes. 

Johnny chuckled this time. "What?"

"For real!?" Brian squealed a little more inflexed than he meant too. 

"Not used t'being ignored are ya?" 

"No." Brian scoffed.

Johnny just hummed in response and picked up the directory. Brian wrinkled his brow in obvious frustration and flailed his arms in front of himself before sitting on the end of the bed. Johnny hid his smile behind the book he held in front of his face, amused with himself. 

A few minutes of silence passed and Brian let out a serious whine. "Jooohnneeeee! Pay attention to meeeeeeaah!" He flopped and whined as dramatically as he could. 

"It's forever before day time, I'm bored in here!" He tried to redeem himself, only getting laughter in response. 

"I'm glad you think this is so funny." He scoffed again, flopping onto his back.

Johnny closed the directory and laid it down. He motioned for him to come to him with his hands. "C,mere" 

Brian crinkled his brows in brief confusion and obliged, walking around the bed to where Johnny lay. "Hmmm?"

"Well I can think of a few things we can do." His sly voice and his rough accent made his words sound even dirtier than they were. Brian's cheeks flushed, he couldn't think of a response, Johnny didn't give him time. 

"They have 24 hr room service, an all night bar down stairs, and a lounge area with pool tables. We can smoke inside at the bar. Let's go?"

Brian face went from one of slight embarrassment to full embarrassment and confusion. His ears turned red with the blush spreading across his body. "I'm not going anywhere in pajamas. Let me change." 

Johnny shook his head no and stood up from the bed. "Nope, come on." 

"What the hell do you mean no? I am not." Brian whined more than he meant to, making Johnny laugh and himself blush again. 

"Brian, no one here cares. Just calm down." Johnny shook his head amused. Slowly he approached him and pulled him into a loose hug. "You are so high strung, let it go man. You know, to be so I don't give a fuck you seem to give a lot of fucks." He pressed his lips to his neck and backed away. 

Brian mumbled incoherently under his breath, and apprehensively followed Johnny out the door. 

"Wrack'em up" Johnny called sliding the rack and balls across the table. They were alone in the lounge area, which helped Brian get more comfortable being in his pajamas. 

"Make it 'nrestesting huh?" Johnny suggested. 

"How do?"

"Well every round I win, you take somethin off." 

Brian just blinked, and pursed his lips. 

"What? Not very confident in your skills?"

"I am, what makes you think you will win?"

"Don't know. I guess if you win, you can still take somethin off." 

Brian put his hands on his hips and laughed. "If you wanted to get me naked all you had to do was tell me. We could have stayed upstairs." 

Johnny cocked a brow at him and chuckled, he bent over the pool table and broke the rack, sinking a few of the balls into the right corner pocket. 

Brian widened his eyes and shook his head, taking his turn. He sank the cue ball, he let out an exasperated sigh and pulled his shirt over his head. "Let's just expedite this. You got me all nervous and shit, I can't play." 

"Your call." Johnny walked around him putting his pool stick away and swatted Brian's ass on the way back around. 

Brian groaned in feigned annoyance and gestured to leave the lounge.


	4. 4

Brian and Johnny ran down the hall of the hotel, past the lobby and up the short flight of stairs to the elevator. The receptionist yelled at them in Korean, they burst out laughing paying her no attention. The hotel security came round the corner as they waited for the elevator, Johnny grabbed Brian's hand and took off down the closest hallway. 

"Shit! We're going to get kicked out!" Brian laughed.

"You act like you've never been banned from somewhere before!" Johnny replied in a whisper out of breath, standing flush against the back side of a wall. 

"You alright old man?" 

"Shut the fuck up you're going to get us caught!" 

They both giggled and rested against the wall waiting for the guards to stop walking past. 

Once it got quiet the walked as quickly and quietly as they could to the next elevator, nodding at a few patrons along the way. 

"I can't believe the shit you get me into Brian Warner." 

Brian scoffed, wide eyed and shocked. "The fuck you say!? Me?" 

"Yes my beautiful angel. You." Johnny spoke with a hostile snark though he meant it light heartedly. 

"I am an angel thank you very much sir. My mama told me so." 

"Rest her soul. She had no idea how much of one you were huh!?" 

Brian slapped him playfully on the arm, as they boarded the elevator. 

"Leave my mama out of this. She didn't need to know." 

"Can I tell you a secret?" Johnny asked looking like a criminal. 

"What?" 

"Your mama knew you well enough to know that under all this shit... you really are an angel." 

"Johnny." Brian spoke softly now, no longer really sharing the joke, but instead feeling nostalgic about the conversation. "Shut the fuck up asshole." Brian closed his eyes and laid his head back against the wall of the elevator. 

"Hey man. I didn't mean to upset you or whatever. You good?" 

"Yeah, not upset. I know you didn't. I just fucking miss her is all. Sometimes I don't think about it, but sometimes it just gets me. My dad too ya know. I'm legit alone in the world now, and all the shit that swarms around me is closing in and I have no where to hide. It's just a reality that likes to hit me in the back sometimes." 

Johnny sat in silence, letting his friend dump his heart, he knew he needed too. He never talked about this stuff, not even to him most of the time. Johnny hadn't meant to rip off a bandaid but he was glad he had in a way. He felt like this trip may be better than he expected. Getting Brian to emote, to detox, and to relax were all things he knew needed to happen. He had only been hoping for at least one of them to happen but if he could knock out all three, he'd take it. Hell he needed all of this too, he was struggling himself. As close as they were, for some reason or another they never let things get to serious. This was going to change that. 

Brian was quiet for the remainder of the ride to their floor. They sat in a comfortable silence, just knowing that they both understood. The bell dinged signaling they'd reached their floor, Johnny patted his back casually as they exited to the floor. 

They entered their room again, in silence. Brian took a seat in on of the plush chairs by the patio and slouched down comfortably into it. After a few minutes Johnny stood in front of him, his face didn't show concern, or really any readable emotion. He just stood and watched his friend, sitting with his eyes closed, focusing on his breaths, leaned back in the chair, trying to hide the way he felt. 

Johnny touched his knee, bringing him back to him.   
"Brian." He spoke as softly as he could, trying not to surprise him. "Look at me Brian." He crouched down in front of him, making them level. Brian opened his eyes and looked at Johnny, his eyes brimmed in red, fighting tears that threatened to leave his eyes if he so much as blinked. Slowly a hand reached his cheek, and he felt as if his heart were going to beat from his chest. As Johnny's thumb slowly stroked his cheek, thumbing away the tears that did fall, he just watched in silence, grounding him, keeping him present. "Brian, I'm sorry." 

Brian looked at him confused. 

"I'm sorry because I haven't been there for you like I should have been. I'm sorry because you think you're alone. I'm sorry that you don't know that you're not."   
He used his free hand to grip the other mans hand and laced his fingers into his. He pulled his forehead close, so that they're lips were close enough to brush when he spoke. 

"Brian, you're never alone, I'm always here, I'll always be here. Like a virus you can't shake. I don't know what this is, what I feel in my heart for you, doesn't coincide with anything I've ever known, but I do know that I love you. Just let me in." 

The tears were flowing freely now, Johnny could taste the saltiness of them as they trickled over his lips. He took a deep breathe and held it, realizing that the tears he tasted weren't only Brian's, they'd mixed with his own. He slipped his hand from Brian's cheek to cradle the back of his head, his teary eyes searching the other pair of teary eyes in front of him. A few silent breaths later and their lips met. Neither was sure of who did it first but this kiss was neither chaste nor hungers, it was comforting, refreshing, it stated all the things they couldn't say. 

Slowly the kiss deepened becoming a tangled mess of teeth and tongues trying to map the place it investigated. Hands became wrapped around the other body, siphoning the warmth the other offered.

Johnny pulled back finally, when the signal within his body changed to a heated fire, and now was not the time for it. Again his eyes searched the others and he stroked his hands through Brian's hair, holding his face with his hands, he kept their faces together. 

"I'll never leave you alone. You're not alone Brian." He whispered the words against his face, repeating it over and over, every time he said it more tears would fall, more walls would crumble. He was certain if he said it enough eventually Brian would believe him. He said the words until his throat hurt and he was hoarse from forcing the muted sound, never letting go of the body he held and rocked. 

Once they both settled and their tears stopped, their breathing regulated, they looked at one another differently. After this, they both new they'd never be the same again. 

Brian's lips met Johnny's and this time the tension was hot, and his body shook, he didn't know what he was doing, but he wanted it. He wanted to feel so close to the man in front of him that could crawl inside of him and still not be close enough. His hands trembled, met with Johnny's more stable but just as uncertain hands, stilling him, calming him. 

The never spoke another word for the rest of the night, they simply let themselves take over, they moved in the most primal of ways together, they sealed the words they'd spoken and melted it together with a heat that couldn't be cooled. As the sun rose and shown through the window in their room, they lay sleeping peacefully, tangled together, locked together, and laced together in every way they could be. Making a silent promise to never let go, they'd hold on to each other, forever. 

Once they began to stir, Brian had the feeling in his gut, and a soreness in his heart and other places that let him know they for sure had to talk about it. Tender wet lips met his temple, silencing the anxiety that began to stir, arms held him tighter as if they knew he needed it, letting him know with their silence the only thing they had to talk about was where to go from here. No remorse or apologies needed. He smiled a small smile and nestled himself in tighter to the body that held him.


	5. 5

They slowly unwound themselves from each other and pulled themselves from the bed. Brian groaned and stretched, wrapping the sheet around himself and shyly looking at Johnny before walking into the bathroom. This was a lot to process, what the hell was going on? What was Johnny trying to prove? He sank down onto the toilet lid and just sat, wrapping his arms around himself. 

A light knock pulled him from his thoughts. "Hey, Bri? You alright?" Johnny asked softly. 

Brian wiped his eyes quickly with the back of his hand and then stood. "Yeah man, sorry. It's uh, it's not locked." 

Johnny opened the door and stared at him for a minute, crinkling his brow. He took a step forward and watched his friend tense, so he backed up again and stood against the sink. "You gonna shower?"

"Yeah. Wanna join me?" 

"Nah, I'll give you your space. I'm going to order us some food, and make a plan for the day. Need anything?" 

Brian shook his head. "I'm sorry." 

"What for?" 

"Being weird." 

"Brian, when have you ever not been weird?" 

"You know what I mean."

"Yeah." Johnny sighed. "I also understand."   
This time Johnny approached feeling a little more at ease, Brian didn't flinch. He rubbed a hand down his covered back and placed a kiss in his head. "Everything is going to be okay. Get cleaned up, I'll go after you."

Brian nodded. Johnny was about to leave the room when Brian perked up a little. "Hey Johnny."

"Yeah man." 

"You know I'm not always a bottom right?"

Johnny's eyes went wide for a second, caught off guard by the unexpected statement. "Okay?" 

"I mean, I'm trying to wrap my head around this, and accept it and whatever, but I don't know what fantasy land you live in, so I need you to know, before anything else happens and I get anymore fucked up and confused, that I am not always the taker, I have been, and enjoy being the giver and the recipient. Full disclosure, this is not my first rodeo, and I don't know what you expect, but I'm not just gonna lay down and let you get your mixed up rocks off sorting out whatever shit you've got going on in your head at the moment. I'm a two way street, and I don't want to be an experiment."  
He went back to staring at the floor, and picking at his fingers. Johnny nodded in understanding. They had a lot to discuss. 

He heard the shower come on and finally felt a little relaxed, he wondered what Brian would feel up to doing. There was a lot to do in Seoul, he wanted him to have to most fun he could.   
When he came out of the shower with his towel wrapped around him, the food had already came up so he plopped down on the bed and went to eat.

"Brian. Come sit at the table with me. Please." Johnny asked softly.

"No." He answered quietly. 

Johnny stood and looked at him, pushing the cart away towards the table. "Why not?" 

Brian looked at him with a smirk. "Those chairs are hard." 

Johnny chuckled. "Touché, I'll put a pillow in one then." He did just that and they moved to the table to eat their breakfast. 

Small gestures of affection were exchanged between the two as a constant, Johnny would lovingly stroke the back of his hand, or grip his shoulder, intertwined their fingers, light touches of reassurance that this wasn't some sort of confused fling. 

Johnny stood to go get his shower, he placed a kiss on Brian's head again before moving to leave. Brian stood with him, and pulled him back, this time initiating a kiss of his own. It wasn't heated, just a simple kiss, familiar, between two people in love the way it felt. He let go and watched him go into the bathroom, taking that time to getting himself dressed. 

Johnny had done a good job stocking clothes for him, he was happy with the selection. He picked a pair of dark waxed denim jeans and a dark grey button up. He pushed his hair back and put his hat on so it would tame his hair, hopefully it would be fixable after Johnny came out of the bathroom.

Johnny came out of the bathroom, a puff of steam following him, Brian's gaze met his and his cheeks reddened. "What you blushing for?" Johnny teased.

"How do you have skin left? I can feel the heat from in there and your skin is red." 

"I like hot showers. Doesn't answer my question." Johnny started looking through the closet for something to put on. 

"I don't know." Brian mumbled out, walking into the bathroom. 

"What are you doing in there?"

"I need to get my hair stuff. I'll have to use the mirror out here." He sighed pretending to be annoyed.

"You could have just came in and got it ya know."  
Johnny dropped the towel, and Brian choked on nothing trying to not stare at him. 

Johnny giggled and rolled his eyes, watching Brian squirm uncomfortably. "You can look Brian." 

"I... um, okay? Do you want me too?" 

"Only if you want too. I don't want you to do anything you don't want to do." Johnny wiggled his pants on. 

"I want too. I just want to be careful with us. If we're going to do this, I want to do it right. I don't want to fuck up what we already have."

"I respect that. I don't want you to think I only brought you here to get in your pants. I did bring us here to have a good time, and to talk about this." He motioned between the two of them. Pulled a T-shirt over his head. "Stop messing with your hair. It looks fine. We're going to be outside, and it's windy. I look like a hobo as per usual. Don't go showing me up." 

"Johnny, you know I am not leaving this room looking like a hobo." 

"Well are you gonna let me look like a hobo?"

"You always look like a hobo, cept when you clean up." 

"You like it when I'm all suited up, don't cha?" He teased.

Brian blushed again. "You do. So what does it for you? My rock star look, or my dapper look? Which one gets you hot and bothered?" Johnny was now in Brian's personal space.

"Shut up Johnny." 

"Well, I can tell you, you all suited up looking like you fell out of GQ does it for me, but I also really really like you all dirty and grungy, especially when you're coming off stage, covered in sweat and make up." He kissed his neck, watching for Brian's reaction. 

"You said you weren't trying to get in my pants." 

"I said that wasn't the only reason we came here."

"So you do want in my pants. Again."

"Of course. But I also know you were very serious about what you said earlier, and I do respect that. I guess we need to discuss boundaries. We've literally never had any."

Brian nibbles his neck now, pulling his body close to his, feeling the heat radiate against him. "We've never really needed them."

"I guess that's true. If you keep doing that, we're going to need more than boundaries though." Johnny let out a gruff moan and pulled himself away before things could go too far.

Brian cleared his throat at bent to grab his shoes.  Lacing them up he watched Johnny do the same.   
"Well what's the plan for the day?"


	6. 6

Brian followed Johnny from the room, and out into the sunny streets of Seoul. It had been a long time since he got to just be normal. They were without guards or anything to draw attention to themselves. Brian was happy for himself, but he was more nervous for Johnny. He knew Johnny was the bigger star between the two of them, he himself could go out if he wanted too, and could go unnoticed if he dressed just right, now that he'd gotten older and had learned to "fit in" usually he only got tailed by some young people or the occasional older fan. For the most part his fans were a little more respectful of his space or afraid to approach, or unsure if it were him, he wasn't sure which combination, but given he was selling out shows he knew they still existed. Johnny on the other hand had to watch out all the time, he rarely if ever just went out to hang out. He had a full crew at all times, to have friends not on his payroll wasn't common because he spent more time with his staff than without them. Brian joked often with him about Johnny hiring him, he never imagined that he would be offering him a spot in his band.  He was scared Johnny was going mauled by fans.   
Johnny didn't seem to worried, in general the Asian countries as a whole seemed to be much more respectful than America. Maybe Seoul was a good choice for that purpose. He looked over at Johnny and smiled a tight small smile. 

"Relax Brian. We're safe and we're fine. I've alerted the government officials that we're here. The press has been informed to keep a distance from us at all times. Fans we can't control, but I don't think they will be an issue." He patted him on the back and stepped out into the street.  

The streets were packed, their hotel seemed to be in the middle of the city. People were everywhere. 

Brian took a deep breath and followed him. "What's the plan?" 

Johnny scoffed. "There isn't one." 

Brian made a face, of surprise, disgust and concern, causing Johnny to laugh. "Calm down. It will be fine Mr. Chaos. I have a loose idea of what there is to do, but our lives are so scheduled I just wanted to do what we wanted. Think you can manage?"

Brian swallowed and nodded. Sure enough they made it five steps before a group of girls in school outfits approached them, albeit calmly but nonetheless. They gave autographs and took a few pictures. The girls weren't prepared for this run in, thankfully, they didn't have merch to sign, they signed the girls backpacks and then they each signed their part of their combined namesake. This was the first time they signed something "Johnilyn" because the girl had said that to them. Brian laughed when he heard it, he'd seen the term float around social media, but he knew Johnny wouldn't be familiar. Johnny raised a brow at him, to which he made a surrender gesture, stating he didn't start the term, he just thought it was funny someone said it to them.   They apologized that they didn't have anything to give them as far as a keepsake, but they assured them that the picture was enough. They parted ways and both hoped they were able to make it unbothered for at least a while longer. 

"So uh, Johnilyn? What's that about?" 

Brian blushed, looking at the ground as they walked. 

"Earth the Brian." Johnny snapped his fingers.

"Oh shit sorry. I spaced out. My head is hurting Johnny."   
Brian struggled to stay beside Johnny on the cramped sidewalk, often forced to walk in front or behind him as they tried to talk.  Finally Johnny stopped and leaned against a rail on a bridge they were crossing on the way into a street market, lining the roads between the shops. 

"Withdrawing? You haven't drank or used since we left LA." 

"Yeah probably. A little, I mean you took my phone so I couldn't call any favors."

"You got anything here? Any hook ups?" Johnny crinkled his brow, he had originally planned on helping him get sober, however that had since been put on the back burner because it didn't seem as pertinent, he'd seemed fine without anything. Until now. 

"I could figure it out. At least get it shipped over in my bag. I'm a professional." He paused, debating if he should continue. This conversation could go deep, but he figured Johnny would stop him. The day was still early enough to turn around. Emotionally unstable, was just a normal day for him, if Johnny wanted to play this game, he was putting all his cards in. Show him the hand he was being dealt. He crammed a hand into his pocket, fishing out a cigarette, lighting it. Took a long drag, offering it to Johnny, with a smile, Johnny took it, looking at him, knowing he had more to say. Brian sighed.   
"It's crazy, I don't even use like I used to when I was a kid ya know, only do blow on tour, and only a little, not even every show, like just a few lines, I don't drink the heavy shit, Whisky is a no go, don't touch Absinthe, tried Jägermeister as a sad replacement, I drink vodka now, like daily, but not enough to even get buzzed, just a drink or two, just gotta do it, gotta taste if, feel it, like old people drink coffee ya know? Im capable of sipping on a drink now, holding an adult conversation with a beverage like they do in the movies, im capable of having one and leaving. But the truth comes down and I'm an addict man, I say I'm not, but my body needs it, I need it, when I get nervous, stressed out, whatever, I want it, need it to make it through. I wanted it when we got here because I was uncomfortable and stressed out. What I don't understand is why I'm like that. Like I could just not do it, I feel like I could just not do it, but then I just wanna do it. If other people are doing it, then I'm going too. If it's important to you that I don't while we're here I won't. Just know, that if you drink I'm gonna drink, because I can't say no." 

"Well if you want to stop I'll help you, if you don't want to stop I won't force you. Just know that when you over do it, and you do sometimes, I worry about you. But everyone fucks up. I'm not going to discuss your sins with you, that's not why we're here, we both know it won't end well if it's not your idea. Just do me a solid and try to keep it under control huh? I don't mind the drinking here and there, but I'd appreciate it if you kept the blow to when we're not together, to many risks, I have my kids to worry about also. The pot, back home is legal, I don't mind so much, but you've got to be careful. You always are with getting caught. So I'll not stop you, but..." he took a breath and sighed. Some of this is a discussion for another day. Let me know what you need. Your head gonna be alright?" 

"Just need some Tylenol we'll Excedrine, I don't think the headache is from the lack of coke, I already hadn't used in a week. My hands are starting to feel shaky though. Maybe I need a drink? Is that alright?" He asked almost shamefully, now that Johnny brought it up, he had to think about it, the last time he thought about it, he and his dad talked about it, the last time itd been thrown in his face, he was in his dads hospital room clutching a water bottle full of vodka he hadn't even touched. Couldn't touch it, just needed it, like a security blanket, to known it was there in case he didn't want to feel, in case any of his family members made him feel worse trying to make him feel better. He knew the hospital would be full of other options, his dads room would be full of other options, he didn't want to pick is old scabs, he'd came way to far and he was hurting way to deep, he needed his security blanket. He spent an hour out of the way looking for that fucking blanket, because Canton is a dry county. Who else does that, an addict. He hadn't thought about it again since getting back home and resuming his tour, his life, being the him he'd learned to be, shutting down, doing what made his dad proud of him. Being the beacon of hope for the lost youth. Here he sat with his best friend, looking in that same damn mirror again, even though he didn't want too. Brian started to fidget, he felt Johnny's stares going through him, so he started to walk again, pulling Johnny's arm.

"Shit man, I'm sorry. I keep doing shit to hurt your feelings. Why are you even my friend?"  

Brian smiled this time. "Because I'm a glutton for pain." He paused. "You're a good friend. Otherwise you wouldn't tell me the truth about how you feel and shit. Regardless of my feelings. It's not your fault I'm all sensitive and shit. Mamas boy." He pointed at himself and grinned.

"Dude, I'm a mamas boy and I'm not sensitive. Not like you." 

"Yeah well. You don't wear lady clothes as part of your job either." He giggled this time. "Rubs off on you eventually and the ladies love a man whose in touch with his sensitive side. Don't cha know? I can be all macho and manly and I'm very pretty thank you." 

"This is true. You are pretty. And handsome. You make my pants tight, my heart race and brain confused. Though we're all getting in sync together." Johnny teased, as they continued to walk through the streets. 

"This shop looks cool, wanna check it out?" Brian grinned, pointing. 

It was full of odd knickknacks, stuff local kids would like. They meandered around a while, Johnny found a hot pink T-shirt with a white cat with big eyes on it, the cat was in a soup bowl, the bowl had a cat on it, there were cat clouds in the background. Johnny laughed and laughed at the shirt, grabbing one,  he came to notice there was lots of cat stuff in this store. Brian was a few rows over looking at a toy of some sort, Johnny shook his head. He always was a child. 

"Hey! Look at this! Look at this!" He breathed out through fits of laughter! "Ima get it for you!! Your girl fans will love it! It's so adorable!" He squealed in his best imitation of his teenage daughter voice. 

Brian cocked his head to the side and tried to look unamused but he bursted into laughter as well.   
"I'll wear it, once, for a pic, to post on Instagram." 

"Yes!" Johnny shouted a little too loudly, making a common gesture with his hand. "I think this shirt is a dude shirt man. Like it's not tiny girl cut." He tried to justify in a serious tone. 

"Greeeat." Brian feigned excitement. He knew Johnny was going to get it, he wasn't getting out of it. He'd wear it, if it made him smile. He truthfully liked the silly shirt. "I like the kitty by the way." 

"Yeah I know."

"Speaking of kitties. Are my babies okay? I didn't get to set up anything. I mean I'm assuming you took care of it, but um, I didn't even tell them I was going anywhere."

Johnny cocked a brow at him. "You know they're cats right. Like they probably hardly notice you're gone. So long as they're being fed. Now the dog, will notice sure..." Johnny teased, earning him a punch in the arm.

"Shut up, my kitties love me." He laughed. "Let's get the shirt and this stuffy and move on." 

"Stuffy? What do you need with the st... whatever, give it to me. Don't even poke that damn lip out, suck it back up, I'm getting the damn thing. Don't know why, but I am." He mumbled as if too himself, but loudly enough for Brian to hear him. 

Brian smiled, mostly proud of the fact that he'd just gotten his way for no apparent reason. He just wanted the kitty stuffy. It reminded him of Lily. He didn't need it for any other purpose than to sit on a shelf in his office when he got home. He just liked it, it made him smile. Sure he could have left it, but he wanted to see if Johnny would get it. Win.

"Come on child. Let's see what else we can get into, while you spend all my money." 

Brian stuck his tongue out and crossed his arms following him out of the shop. A cart went by with snow cones. Johnny saw his face before he even opened his mouth. "No! It's not even lunch time." 

"I didn't even say anything! I also have my own money. You took my wallet remember?" He used his surrender hands.

"You didn't need too. I know you and your love of all things sweet." Johnny ignored his last comment. He had taken his wallet, this was his treat, he knew there was no other way Brian would let him take care of everything. Financially they were both well off, but Johnny had capabilities and connections Brian didn't, he wasn't going to let him try to pay him back for anything. 

Brian leaned in a little more to him and whispered to him. "You mean like you?" 

Johnny blushed, the heat reaching his ears this time. Brian laughed, having had the upper hand in this round. "There's a thing I wanted to check out here. I can go by myself though if you're not into it. I already know it's not really your thing. We can meet up later if you want." He looked around. 

"You want to go by yourself? I understand if you need some space. I know how you operate. But I'd like to go with you, I'm not tired of spending time with you yet on this trip." Johnny replied forcing his gaze to meet through their tented glasses. 

"I mean I don't want to go alone. I just expect to. I'm used to doing shit by myself when other people don't want to go. I'm weird, I like what I like." 

"Brian have you met me?"

"Yeah, which is why I also know you may not want to go."

"What is it? I mean what are you want to go do? Go to church? There's like a million Catholic ones oddly enough. I didn't expect that." Johnny tried to joke, though it fell flat, and Brian only stared back at him. 

"I wanna go to the Lock Museum. They have like 10,000 locks! And then the Trick Eye Museum. I want to go there too. I like all that nerdy shit." His face was lit up like an excited kid, but then it fell, almost as soon as it started. "I also know you came here to have fun and not go to museums so if there is something you'd rather do I wouldn't be offended by you ditching me." He mumbled a little more quietly.

"I came here to spend time with you shit head. I'm not ditching you so you can go to a museum by yourself. I hear there's a few more fun museums we could check out while we're here if you want too." 

"Oh yeah? I'm down. But I want to see those locks first. Also it's closer to lunch now. Wanna get some food?" 

"Yeah, I'm starting to get hungry. We ate breakfast way too early. It's 1 now. See anything?" Johnny put his hands in his pockets, and looked around for a restaurant.

"Do you have your phone? Look up something." 

Johnny found a ramen place that looked interesting enough. They decided to go there and grab lunch. 

"Do you know where the museums are?" 

"Not a clue. Probably not gonna be able to walk though." 

The restaurant was about a ten minute walk. Johnny google mapped the museums. Walking would take over half an hour to get to each one. They decided to call a cab for that endeavor. 

With lunch they each ordered one vodka cranberry, and a water. By the end of lunch Brian's shaky hands had settled, he'd gotten some headache medication from a vending machine. Over all he was feeling a little better. 

Brian finished his first and scooted his bowl to the side, watching Johnny slurp his noodles. "Can I ask you a question?"

Johnny looked up, mid slurp, noodles hanging from his lips, eyes big. He nodded and hummed. "Mmhmm"

"So when do we talk about boundaries? I mean, there are boundaries outside of the room ya know?"

"When do you want to talk about it? Now?" 

"If you do. I just need to know what's up. I find myself stopping so many things that would just be normal, that I usually wouldn't even notice but now I'm hyper aware of every single thing. Like even hugs feel questionable. I feel like I've done something wrong and I don't want to make it worse."

Johnny's has dropped, for a moment he felt angry. 

"What the hell have you done wrong? Brian!?" He saw Brian's face drop, and noted the tone of his own voice. He paused for a moment, taking a breath. "You haven't done anything wrong. Please don't pull away. Just continue on as normal. I'm sorry I complicated stuff. I just... needed, wanted, you to know what was going on. I love you Brian. Even if you don't feel that way about me, I'll still love you as a best friend." 

"That's the problem Johnny. I can't be your best friend." Johnny's felt like he was going to faint. They were 3 days into their trip, first official day post jet lag and out of the room, and already he'd fucked up everything. He told Brian too much, did too much at the wrong time, he'd gone about this all the wrong way. 

He couldn't stop the tears that welled up in his eyes. He tried, he started to blink quickly. His mouth felt dry and sticky, time felt like it'd stopped. The tears came fast. Not even a ten seconds had passed since Brian had finished his sentence. 

"Shit, Man, dude are you okay? Johnny!?" 

Johnny clutched his chest, he started to hyperventilate. He felt like the room was getting smaller and smaller and he couldn't breathe. 

"Johnny can you hear me!? I need you to look at me. Tell me five things you can see."

"T-table, b-b-bowl, shoes, ch-chair, spoon."

Brian pulled his chair beside him and rubbed circles on his back. "Good job, okay. Four things you can touch." He soothed. 

They went through the grounding exercise by the end Johnny was calming down, sobbing apologies. 

"It's okay. Johnny, what happened? Are you okay?"

"Panic attack, happens, not often, not in a long time. I'm sorry. It's just all of this, it's a lot ya know." 

"Yeah, I know. That's why I want to talk about it. I don't want to just run into something with you specifically with you just because it's fun. I can't lose you. There's too much to lose."

"I'll get you back home okay." Johnny looked at him with teary regretful eyes.

Brian slammed his hand down on the table. "What the fuck are you talking about?! I do not want to go home. I... you... shits all fucked up inside right now and I want to figure this shit out. If that's why we're here then let's figure it out. Please?" 

Johnny looked confused. "But you just said, you couldn't be my best friend knowing what you know, we had sex Brian. We can't undo that. I'm sorry." 

"Shit Johnny! I wasn't done. We can't be best friends, because I love you. I'm in love with you. I have been. I just push it away, chocked it up to best friend bromance shit. Johnny. You don't pull away from me." He pulled him in, kissing the top of his head. A few people in the restaurant took a few pictures he figured something would be on social media, the conversation was quiet enough they could lie about the details, if they needed too. Right now he couldn't be bothered, he just wanted to make sure his friend was okay. 

They finally left the restaurant two hours after they arrived, and called a Lyft to take them to the museum. Once in the car Brian leaned over real quietly whispered in Johnny's ear. "Hey Johnny, if I ask you another question you promise not to panic on me?" 

"Yeah what's up?" 

"Will you hold my hand? Like on the plane? Is that allowed?" 

Johnny smiled and reached over, taking his hand, intertwining their fingers. "That was three questions." 

"Asshole. Just hold my hand. I'm following your lead here, till we talk." 

"We can talk when we get back to the room tonight okay? Till then just be normal." 

Brian tried to let go of his hand, letting out a sigh. Johnny didn't let go. "Johnny this" he waved their hands in front of them "isn't normal."

"It's normal enough. It's private enough. Short conversation, till we talk at least, I like privacy, much as you do. Obvious affection is prefer to keep between us, stuff we already do publicly is fine. For me. That good with you?"

Brian smiled and nodded. "That sounds good to me. I'm super excited about this museum. Last time I was in Seoul I wanted to go but I didn't get too. Do you think we will see all of them? I want to touch some." 

"I don't think you're allowed to touch any. Please don't get arrested here." 

"I won't. If there's a sign I'll leave them alone. Promise to follow all the rules on vacation." 

"Good. Oo here we are. The ever exciting Lock Museum!" Johnny chimed.

"Don't be an ass. I said you didn't have to come."

"And I said I wasn't ditching you. Tomorrow we can do something I wanna do, that you will not like. Sports!?" 

Brian rolled his eyes and huffed. 

"Fine."


	7. 7

The Lock Museum was actually pretty amazing as was the Trick Eye museum. By the time they'd finished with both of them they were beat and ready to get back to the room. The sun had gone down and many of the shops had closed down. They found a restaurant to have dinner before calling a ride to take them back. 

"Just because that wasn't as awful as you made me think it was going to be, I won't make you watch sports tomorrow." 

Brian sighed out a laugh. "We should find a karaoke bar and do that tomorrow!"

"Oh God! That would be fun. You don't want to go now?" 

"No man. I'm fucking tired. I just want to get back to the room." Brian picked at his plate but he wasn't really eating anymore.

"Everything okay? If you're done you don't have to eat it." Johnny placed his hand over Brian's fidgety one.

Brian gasped quietly in surprise. "Sorry. I didn't realize I was doing that. I'm finished. I'm really tired." Brian tried to smile at him, but he was literally having trouble keeping his eyes open, this trip was taking a lot out of him. He hoped the next few days would be less exhausting, his anxiety was settling and he was feeling better. He knew that had a lot to do with why he was so tired. 

"It's okay. Let's get the check so we can go. I'll run you a hot bath in that giant tub, you can soak a while if you want. Might help you feel better. You're leg bothering you?" 

"No it's okay. Soaking would be nice. You wanna get in with me?" 

Johnny smiled at the proposition. "You sure?"   
Brian laced their fingers together and nodded.

They walked into the hotel room, with Brian already peeling off his clothes, and grumbling about everything being sore. He threw them down into a heap on the floor and flopped himself onto the bed in his underwear as Johnny walked into the bathroom and started to fill the tub. Brian smiled to himself as he lay There thinking about what the future might hold for them. 

"What are you grinning at?" 

Brian was startled from his thoughts, a deep blush coming over his body. "Nothing." He mumbled.

"You over there looking like a Cheshire Cat, dont tell me nothing." Johnny teased as he sauntered over to him, placing himself over his hips straddling the other man. 

"Humph, you're squishing me." 

"Oh hush." Johnny wiggled himself over Brian's crotch, smirking at the moan he got from the other man.   
Brian rocked his hips up involuntarily to meet the friction as his member hardened against Johnny. He moved his hands and placed them on Johnny's hips, rocking himself against him harder, closing his eyes, mouth falling open in a hungry frustrated sounding groan. Johnny bent capturing his mouth with his, a moan coming from his own lips, hands traveling over naked body beneath him. 

"The tub is going to over flow." Brian snickered into his mouth, pulling him down, wrapping his arms around his body. 

"I can't shut it off if I can't get up."

"Id say you're up." Brian giggled referring to the hardness pressing into his abdomen as Johnny leaned into him. 

Johnny untangled himself and stood adjusting himself in his jeans, he blushed but looked at Brian. "That's your fault, now come on, let's get that bath." He held his hand out for Brian to take. 

Brian wiggled his underwear off, Johnny's eyes roamed his body lustily while he stood from the bed. 

"You're over dressed for the occasion." Brian slinked into the darkened bathroom and sank into the tub with a sigh.   
The bathroom it's self was fairly large, the tub was huge, and oblong, white tile floors and faint blue walls kept it looking chic but classic. Most of the objects of daily living had been put away into one of the overhead cabinets, leaving the room it's fairly bare, save for the tub and rug by it, along with a ornate cushioned bench running along the wall in front of the vanity. A partition separated the toilet and shower area from the bathing area, there were four tiered flameless candles sitting atop the wall giving the room a faint glow. It was quiet. Only the sound of the water, and breathing could be heard. 

"Oy, you're right." Johnny spoke barely audibly, grinned and slowly started to slip out of his clothes, aware of Brian's eyes on him. 

Brian lay against the back of the tub, chewing on his lip, hand lazily moving over his hard cock, watching Johnny undress, occasionally stifling a moan, looking at him. 

Johnny finally joined him in the tub, aware of the activities he backed up so he was against him, stilling the other man, resting his head against his chest. 

"You know it's hard to wank off with you laying there." Brian all but whispered to maintain the silence. 

Johnny scoffed and rolled his head to look up at him, "Well then why don't you just take me?" 

Brian wrapped an arm around his chest and placed a kiss on his neck. "As much as I want too, I know you're not ready, and the bath would be a horrible place for your first time." His voice was husky and longing, more so than he intended, it sent shivers down Johnny's spine.

He did want it, but deep down he knew Brian was right, he wasn't ready, he was reacting to their conversation, or their lack of conversation. He knew Brian would want it to be just right, he was hopeless that way. Now he felt rejected and embarrassed, he curled into himself nestling against Brians body.

Brian caressed his body, soothing him, placing sweet kisses over his body. Turning him to face him, he held his face gently in his hands, kissing him deeply. Johnny returned the kiss, quickly turning it into a heated needy kiss. Their hands moved over each other pulling each other close, their cocks hard pressing against one another beneath the water. 

Johnny pulled back panting lightly, feeling his lips tingling from the sensation of Brian. "Come here. Let me give you a massage per my original plan." He teased. Brian turned his body to readjust so he was now in front of Johnny, laying back against him. 

Johnny worked his hands over his shoulders and neck, down his arms, and back up, kneading the muscles. He could feel the tension as it gave in some and recoiled in others, Brian went slack against his body in a euphoric state, the sexual tension slowly fading as he relaxed into the ministrations of the other mans hands. Soft touches of calloused fingertips were soothing in ways he didn't expect, the repetition of patterns over his body lulled him into a trance. It was as if Johnny knew he needed certain stimuli to be exaggerated and others to be eliminated to relax, to shut down. Though of course he did, Johnny seemed to know a lot more about him than he'd realized. He found himself thinking of the secret things he knew about him. What could he do in return?


	8. 8

The sun was creeping into the bedroom and they began to stir. Brian rolled onto his back and pulled Johnny to meet him. "Good morning." He whispered, smiling at him. "What wonderful things do have planned to woo me with today?" He teased. Johnny scoffed sleepily. "Haven't I wooed enough? Let's just sleep and be lazy the rest of the time. See how much you like me then. Huh?" 

Brian looked at him and then nodded. He rolled more onto his side, so he could run his nails over his back. He scratched his back soothingly for a while. "Mostly that sounds wonderful, except, I think you will grow to hate me first. You know how I get!" Brian whined a little as he spoke to emphasize his point.

"Well true. You are sort of like an unsupervised toddler with a shopping cart." Johnny laughed at his own joke, unable to hold a straight face. Brian punched him lazily in the side. 

"Well what do you want to then? There's a whole city out there." 

"What if we order some lunch and have a picnic somewhere? Then we could uh, have that conversation we need to have?" Johnny spoke timidly keeping his eyes down cast.

Brian tilted his head up placing a kiss on his lips. "That sounds good for me. We don't have to do anything fancy. And talking sounds good." He kissed him again. Johnny let out a small moan. 

"Why don't we just stay here and do this?" Johnny whispered. 

"Well as much as I'd love too, I've really got to pee now. And brushing our teeth is not optional." Brian giggled, and slipped out of bed before Johnny could capture him and keep him there. Johnny slowly crawled from bed and walked into the bathroom as well. Standing beside Brian he grabbed his toothbrush and grinned. 

"This is nice eh?" He spoke to the reflection I the mirror. 

"Whoat?" Brian mumbled around his toothbrush before spitting into the sink. 

"This. You. Me. Doing normal couple stuff."   
Johnny smiled big starting to brush his own teeth.

Brian finished rinsing and started on his hair. "Yeah JD it's nice." He played with his hair some more getting it just how he wanted before leaning onto the counter watching Johnny. Johnny now had finished brushing his teeth and wiped off his face. He picked up a brush and ran it through his hair and sat it down. 

"Shower?" He extended a hand to Brian and arches his brow. 

"Is that a joke, I just fixed my hair." 

Johnny pressed himself against Brians body, and ran his fingers over his chest and started playing innocently with the buttons, undoing them with one hand as slipped his other hand around his back pulling him close. He ran his hand up his back, grabbing the collar of his shirt, as his other hand traced over his chest slowly. Johnny grinned at him, knowing what he was doing, but also knowing that they had a limit until they had the rest of the pending conversation. "You sure you don't want to join me?" He pressed his lips to his neck. Brian relaxed, pressing into him, wrapping his own arms around Johnny's hips. Brian let out a low moan and tilted his head to nip back at Johnny only to be stopped short when Johnny ruffled his hair with one hand and then backed up smiling like a champion. "Hair doesn't look fixed to me." He giggled and pulled Brian by his hands toward the large shower. Brian stalked behind him exaggerating a defeated groan. 

"We aren't leaving this room today are we?" Brian murmured, stepping into the shower behind Johnny. Before Johnny could respond, Brian had one hand on either side of him, his big eyes filled with lust, looking down at him, as Johnny looked up at him wanting him to be the one to make the move. 

Having Brian tower over him like that was hot by it's self, looking at his tattooed arms in a totally different way, water cascaded over them, some of his dark hair hung in his face. Yeah they'd been intimate a few times before, but the tone of this encounter was different, In the brief moment that passed between them, Brian captured Johnny's lips with his own, tracing his bottom lip with his tongue asking for entrance. Johnny tried to keep a stifle a small moan but failed as Brian deepened the kiss. Brian moved his arms from the shower wall to Johnny's body, pressing their bodies close together. Both of them let their hand roam over the other, their cocks now hard and pressing into one another. Johnny broke the kiss to catch his breath, Brian rested his forehead against him briefly, and then slowly and eagerly pressed kisses along his neck, lingering in the places that got the most responses. He rubbed his hands over his chest making sure to graze his nipples lightly. Johnny was mewling and moaning shamelessly with Brians ministrations. Brian shifted his legs, so that he could wedge one leg between his, pressing his thigh flush against Johnny manhood, causing Johnny to gasp out at the friction.

"Brian please." Johnny cried desperately as Brian cupped his ass and spread him gently apart. The motion causing Johnny to mewl loudly and thrust his hips. Kissing him deeply, Brian chuckled. "Let's get out?" He shut the water off and grabbed towels.

Once they were dried off, Brian took the others towel and dropped it to the floor. Walking him backwards to the bed, he peppered his neck and collar bones with searing kisses as his hands steadied him as they moved over his back and cradled his neck, lowering them to the bed. Johnny's eyes were wide, he couldn't will them closed trying to take in everything that was happening. Everything was so different, Brian was different, his touch was firmer, his kisses more confident, his eyes were darker, but wide and they looked over Johnny as if he were his prey. Johnny got lost in his eyes, keening for a moment, arching his hips trying to meet the mans body that was now pinning him to the bed.   
Their bodies moved together as they kissed and hands explored, their breathing was getting heavy, and movements were getting desperate. Brian slipped a hand between them and gripped Johnny's leaking cock, causing him to buck and hiss. He rubbed his hand over his throbbing member, resting his head in the crook of his neck. "I want you so bad Johnny." He breathes out barely getting his words out as he spoke, removing his hand and lacing their hands together instead. "If you say no, then I'll suck you off and give you the rub down you've ever had, if you want to try and it's too much, we stop, and I'll still suck you off and rub you down. If I've totally freaked you out, because you didn't see this coming, I can massage you and we can cuddle?"

Johnny blinked and stared back at him. "I had questions, but I guess this is probably better."

Brian sighed. "No, it's not. If you're not sure, it's not the right time."

Johnny crinkled his face at him, and then spoke with confusion. "My dick didn't get that hard from doubt.  What ever that was, you need to turn it back on Because I was really into it. Seriously... -he paused and swallowed thickly- I'm ready, I want you, it's consumed my thoughts, I just. Um, can it be done, I want to look at you."

Brian nodded. He sat up on his heels for a moment and grabbed the lube from the bedside table. "Let's just see how it goes okay. No matter what, thank you for giving yourself to me."   
Brian truly felt that way, even if Johnny were unable to do it past prep, or even prep at all, the fact that he was willing to try meant a lot to him and what their relationship meant. 

 

A/N smut maybe in the next chapter. I can't decide if I want to graphically depict JD losing his virginity, if he's able too. Either way, big things are happening for our boys here in South Korea. They've still got a week left. Maybe Brian will bite the bullet and start letting JD spoil him like he wants too?


	9. Chapter 9

Johnny nodded, looking over Brians decorated body as if he were seeing it for the first time. Brian smirked down at him, his fingers slick with the lubricant. "What are looking at so intently huh?" 

A deep blush went over Johnny and and shivered at having been caught. "Looking at your tattoos. - he swallowed trying to speak, as Brian flattened himself on top of his chest- "your skin, how your muscles were moving. I was just admiring you." 

"Mmm I see. I like looking at you too." He pecked a kiss on his nose, and then went in for another kiss. He let his body flatten against the other man, grinding their bodies together like two teenagers, making out. His clean hand he placed by Johnny's head stroking his hair, as he started placing hungry kisses over his body. That dominance he'd demonstrated earlier had returned with a fire, and Johnny was melting into it. Mewling and panting to his touches, he raised his hips to keep their bodies pressed together. 

Brian slithered the lubed hand between them, never separating their lips, only deepening the kiss, he let his finger find Johnny's entrance, circling it slowly. Johnny inhaled quickly, his eyes opened wide at the surprise of the feeling, after a few seconds and a few soothing kisses he relaxed to the touch. 

Brian watched his eyes as he moved over him. He slowly began pressing against his opening. Johnny breathed in deeply but never exhaled as he nervously waited for penetration. 

"Breathe babe." Brian rasped against his ear, his lust having fully taken over. Johnny let out the breathe he didn't realize he was still holding, and he involuntarily arched his hips into Brian, keening when his own cock met the full heaviness of the cock above him. He groaned in slight pain as the finger made its way inside of him, but he adjusted to the strange sensation quickly.

Johnny let out a few labored breaths as Brian worked his finger inside of him, he tried to relax his body. As his body relaxed, so did the rest of him, Brian took this opportunity to work in the second finger. Johnny again tightened his grip on Brian biceps and his breaths came raggedly. 

Brian gently peppered kisses along his jawline, and then to his lips. "Is it okay for me to keep moving? Or do you want me to stop?" Johnny looked at him really serious. "Please get me ready. I want to do this." He wiggled a little. "It feels weirder when you're fingers are just there. Move them. Please?" Brian looked him in his eyes and kissed him deeply, earning a moan from his partner. He pulled back, taking a deep breath at the sight of his lover. A thin sheen of sweat shone over his face, his eyes were wide, with want and love. Brian pressed his forehead to the other, nipping at his lip occasionally.   
Suddenly, Johnny's arms flung to the bed, and his hips bucked as his back arched him off of the bed, a surprised moan rushing from his lips, totally ruining the loving moment they were having but giving Brian the confidence to move things forward and not stop them where they were with a blow job or something. "That's the spot huh?" He teased a little making sure to swipe his fingers over it a few more times. Johnny was writhing on the bed beneath him now, he nodded. "Now I get it. This is why you like this." He giggled and moaned at the same time. Brian continued to scissor him open, making sure to hit his pleasure spot occasionally. "Brian, if you don't stop, I think I'm going to cum before you ever get close to putting your dick inside me." 

Brian shrugged, bending over him kissing his lips before kissing down his neck, sucking a little on his collar bone and nipping at his nipples. "Mmmm ahh ahhh really Brian. That's fucking amazing, I've never felt anything that felt like that. You're really going to want to take a break if you plan on fucking me. I think I'm literally going to cum." His body continued writhing, his legs were starting to kick around on the bed.   
Brian placed a kiss at the center of his chest, resting his chin, but looking Johnny in the eye. 

"Does this feel good?" 

"Yeah?"

"Do you like it?" 

"Yeah."

"That's all that matters to me babe. That you like whatever we do. Whatever I'm doing to you. If you want to cum, then cum. If you want me to stop I'll stop." 

"I want you." He panted out. 

With his free hand, Brian lifted his chin so that he couldn't hide his eyes, he rested his palm against his cheek. "You have me. Like this, just as much. I love you." 

Johnny nodded, he hooked his arms under Brian's and pulled him down flush with his own body, he nestled his face in the crook of his shoulder. "Make me cum. Please?" 

Brian chuckled against his hair, pressed a kiss against his temple. Johnny was hard against his body, every time Brian hit that spot his hips would arch into his own. Brian lifted his hips just enough to    lift Johnny's to meet him. Once he had them at a better angle, Johnny couldn't really arch himself into  Brian anymore, but Brian had plenty of leverage to hold onto Johnny and grind their hardened bodies together just right, while his other hand fingered him open. 

With their lips pressed together, their breathing was becoming labored. Johnny's back arched more into the bed as he mewled and moaned at the overwhelmingness of it all. His body began contracting around Brian's fingers, he started to stiffen, he tried to bury is face in the crook of his shoulder again, but Brian wouldn't let him. "Cum for me. I'm going to cum Johnny, cum for me." He murmured into his ear as he kissed his neck. With that Johnny came hard, a deep growl escaping his throat, his body rocking without his control, spasming against the body above him, as his warmth spread between their bodies pulling the other over the edge with a softer satisfied moan. 

Their bodies relaxed, one on top of the other. Brian withdrew his fingers slowly, and wiped them on a discarded towel. Exhaustedly lying his head on the other mans shoulder.   
"We need another shower!" He whined playfully.

"It's your own fault!"

"Yeah well. I'm taking a nap first."

"You had better get off of me! I have literally got jizz running down the side of my body!"

"I did get off on you. Geez. That was the point." 

"Brian. You said you wanted to go do stuff or something! Let me up now."

"Fine." He rolled off him, and sat up. "To the shower then?" 

"Separately this time. I don't want a repeat. It's probably close to dinner time. Seriously think of what you want to do. We have a few days left here, let's make the most of it."

"Johnny. I think you can consider this mission complete." He grinned really big, wrapping a towel around his waist, and grabbing a tourist pamphlet. 

There were still a lot of things they could do, he wanted this trip to be fun. They never get to go anywhere and he didn't know when they'd get to go anywhere again. He started looking and waited patiently for his turn at the shower.


End file.
